Saturday, June 27, 2009 @ 2:11 AM
I didn't deny but I haven't admitted.
I questioned but I haven't regretted.
Struggling in such a thing is such a miserable way to suffer.
I have no idea how I landed myself in such a state,
but I knew I somehow made it 'till this stage.
Is it only me being able to 'feel' much more than before, or am I just purely getting weaker after so many blows?
I'd like to pen down everything, I'd like to record every slight details.
I want to take it out like a diary to read it in the future to see how silly I was before, or even 'till the time I take it out to read.
But there's just too much of repeating of the strong confusion of feelings.
I have pride, and also a pretty stubborn person too.
At this current state, I'm still not ready to give in.
But unknowingly, I've been giving much more than I realised.
Why?
It's 2am now, I still can't get myself to sleep.
Despite the fact I cried rather hard while listening to a few tracks going on my playlist.
Not used to it or nonsense are occupying too much of my mind?
Perhaps I have too much time to spend on such random/messy thoughts?
And now I'm thinking :"Why am I thinking why do I have so many questions?"
Whatever, I'm off to bed.
Girls' nature - thinks a lot and in many aspect.
I feel my mind's branching out like an old tree.